soddymommy

Overwhelmed mom needing encouragement

Recommended Posts

soddymommy

Today my almost two year old son was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum, it's been a bit hard to wrap my head around. I really though the dr would say he just has some speech delays and he will need some therapy, but not only does he have autism, it's between mild and moderate. I have to be honest, after having a child with CP and many other issues, I was so looking forward to doing school with this last little guy and now I'm not sure what that's going to look like. I think fear of the unknown is gripping me a bit right now and I need to not do that. So now I have one with ADHD/ODD, one with CP and other issues, and one with autism. God must think I am wonder woman or something.

Anyway, can anyone recommend any good resources for leading about ASD like books or websites? Thanks for your help and support (and for letting me rant a bit). I love the support on here.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Merry

(((Hugs))) and praying for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Z3TL

God does think you are wonder woman!

 

my dd10 is on the autism spectrum.  where we are (Southern Africa) they call "mid to moderate" "medium to high functioning" she is non-verbal and only spoke at 4.

 

as a start go read up all you can on www.autism.uk it is the national health services in the uk.  they give a really fair foundation of the basics.  your child will respond really well with visual cues.  you might have posters or picture booklets all over your home but if that helps him then its worth it. 

 

photos with different feelings/expressions of different family members is good. we also turned it into a game seeing if we could all guess each others feelings based on the facial expression. 

 

The movie of Temple Grandin really helped me and my dh come to terms with things we gave the movie to our pastors, friends family etc to help them understand what we were dealing with and so they could pray for us as a family more effectively

 

you can also get autism service dogs

 

pm me if you would like to know more

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Hauxa Mom

I'm sorry. Kind of expecting one diagnosis and then receiving another must have been a really unpleasant shock.

 

Prayers and ((Hugs)).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Countrymom9

Today my almost two year old son was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum, it's been a bit hard to wrap my head around. I really though the dr would say he just has some speech delays and he will need some therapy, but not only does he have autism, it's between mild and moderate. I have to be honest, after having a child with CP and many other issues, I was so looking forward to doing school with this last little guy and now I'm not sure what that's going to look like. I think fear of the unknown is gripping me a bit right now and I need to not do that. So now I have one with ADHD/ODD, one with CP and other issues, and one with autism. God must think I am wonder woman or something.

Anyway, can anyone recommend any good resources for leading about ASD like books or websites? Thanks for your help and support (and for letting me rant a bit). I love the support on here.

 

 

I understand the fear/frustration. I got a lot of help and support here with my last four, all SN in one way or another, especially when ds21 was in his teens.

 

I don't have any suggestions, really, but will be praying for you. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
soddymommy

Thank you all for the prayers, you ladies on here are such a great group of encouragement. I'll check out that website. I'm very fortunate to already have a lot of help in place because of my other sons disabilities, I have a lot of therapists to call on :). It's weird because I feel so different today about him and yet, I don't want to. I really hate feeling like I'm seeing him differently now, trying not to over analyze everything he's doing. Hope it wears off soon.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Wesley

Hi soddymommy. I think we messaged back and forth last June about the therapy we do for my son with CP. I thought I would tell you about my daughter for what it may be worth. Both of my children were internationally adopted at 12 months and had a rough start in life. My daughter was 3 years old before she said Mama, 3.5 when she said no and 4 years and 2 months before she began really talking. She was very shy with strangers and well behind on fine and gross motor skills. A couple of times someone asked if she was autistic. I avoided diagnosis and we moved often, so no one was tracking us very well. I was almost certain they would call her autistic, but I just didn't think the diagnosis really fit and didn't feel the diagnosis would help us at that stage. She was so stressed with strangers that we avoided speech therapy until just recently. I focused on making her feel loved and secure, along with trying diet changes (didn't help, unfortunately). Now she is 8. She is doing great. She is easily at or above grade level academically, involved in sports, has friends, and is very loving. She is still a little behind on fine and gross motor. She is a bit immature which makes her socially awkward at times. She avoids eye contact with adults she doesn't know well. But, everything keeps improving. In a rush to do what's best and provide early intervention services, I think there is over diagnosis. Sometimes we compare children's development too much. In our case a combination of stranger fear, delayed speech and immaturity. Since you were only expecting speech therapy and he is just two, maybe you are right. Maybe a little time or a second opinion. I think that had my daughter received an unnecessary autistic diagnosis early on, that label would have only hurt her. People starting seeing the diagnosis and not the child. Even now I would avoid putting her in a situation were someone is biased towards diagnosing autism. By sharing this I don't want to sound critical of anyone else who has sought for some understanding and help for their children. The right thing to do is often a hard call and different in each situation.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
slac

Hugs to you.  My son, 15, has Asperger's, ADHD, Dysgraphia, and anxiety.  He wasn't formally diagnosed until about 6 grade but we knew way beforehand that he had it.  Still, it was hard to actually HEAR it said.  

 

We had David in therapy from the time was about 18 months.  At the highest, he was in various therapies  up to 18x/per month.  I don't say that to scare you, but when you can get them into therapy when they are young, you can get them into free programs.  Or almost free programs.  And they help.  I have seen so much improvement in David, it isn't even funny.  I truly don't think he would be doing as well as he is  now if it weren't for those therapies.  

 

Now, he only goes to therapy for his anxiety.   

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Blessed by His grace

Hugs and prayers.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
soddymommy

Hi soddymommy. I think we messaged back and forth last June about the therapy we do for my son with CP. I thought I would tell you about my daughter for what it may be worth. Both of my children were internationally adopted at 12 months and had a rough start in life. My daughter was 3 years old before she said Mama, 3.5 when she said no and 4 years and 2 months before she began really talking. She was very shy with strangers and well behind on fine and gross motor skills. A couple of times someone asked if she was autistic. I avoided diagnosis and we moved often, so no one was tracking us very well. I was almost certain they would call her autistic, but I just didn't think the diagnosis really fit and didn't feel the diagnosis would help us at that stage. She was so stressed with strangers that we avoided speech therapy until just recently. I focused on making her feel loved and secure, along with trying diet changes (didn't help, unfortunately). Now she is 8. She is doing great. She is easily at or above grade level academically, involved in sports, has friends, and is very loving. She is still a little behind on fine and gross motor. She is a bit immature which makes her socially awkward at times. She avoids eye contact with adults she doesn't know well. But, everything keeps improving. In a rush to do what's best and provide early intervention services, I think there is over diagnosis. Sometimes we compare children's development too much. In our case a combination of stranger fear, delayed speech and immaturity. Since you were only expecting speech therapy and he is just two, maybe you are right. Maybe a little time or a second opinion. I think that had my daughter received an unnecessary autistic diagnosis early on, that label would have only hurt her. People starting seeing the diagnosis and not the child. Even now I would avoid putting her in a situation were someone is biased towards diagnosing autism. By sharing this I don't want to sound critical of anyone else who has sought for some understanding and help for their children. The right thing to do is often a hard call and different in each situation.

Yes I remember!  How are you?  I appreciate your thoughts.  I certainly don't want to define him by something, I'm hoping we can use our therapy but also help him develop as naturally as possible.  We will get him reevaluated in a few years and see what that looks like then.  I really honed in on the speech issues, but that really wasn't the big thing that the dr was concerned about, he has a lot of repetitive behaviors that really stood out that I hadn't really taken into consideration before, I was so focused on the communication issue that there were several other red flags I didn't really mention.  We will see what happens as he gets older.

 

 

Hugs to you.  My son, 15, has Asperger's, ADHD, Dysgraphia, and anxiety.  He wasn't formally diagnosed until about 6 grade but we knew way beforehand that he had it.  Still, it was hard to actually HEAR it said.  

 

We had David in therapy from the time was about 18 months.  At the highest, he was in various therapies  up to 18x/per month.  I don't say that to scare you, but when you can get them into therapy when they are young, you can get them into free programs.  Or almost free programs.  And they help.  I have seen so much improvement in David, it isn't even funny.  I truly don't think he would be doing as well as he is  now if it weren't for those therapies.  

 

Now, he only goes to therapy for his anxiety.   

We also have free therapies, which is one reason I wanted some answers so we can take advantage of those.  We are so used to therapy by now it's just become a normal part of our scheduels.  I'm hoping since we are getting help now that he will make some good progress.

 

Hugs and prayers.

Thank you so much!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Lalibela

Early intervention programs are wonderful! They can be so helpful and effective. Personally, I would be hesitant to accept a label at such a young age, but I am a bit rebellious like that. One of my good friends had her son diagnosed as autistic when he was a toddler. They did early intervention programs that were covered through the state, and he made amazing progress. They subsequently changed his diagnosis from autism spectrum. He is eight or nine now, and right on target with milestones. My own sons both had very delayed walking and speech. One of them is incredibly smart and deep thinking, and the other one is a very square peg with major learning and coping issues. They both talk way too much :). They are both a sweet joy in my heart in their own ways. I just wanted to encourage you that it doesn't change who that child really is. It only matters for getting them therapy, etc. but they are still the same child they were last week. Don't worry about the learning disabilities or any of that until you come to that road. Hugs to you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4quintmom

I have 4 15 year olds. Three of them have CP, one is in a wheelchair, the other two are pretty mobile. Therapy has been a part of our life forever, too. I decided that having labels is OKAY when it gets them what they need. I just had my daughter, Caterina, who is in a wheelchair, in for neuropsychiatric evaluation because I knew she should be labeled as severely multiply impaired. She has a seizure disorder and cannot stand. Her IQ testing showed some significant issues with math and visual spatial understanding, but her vocabulary is quite good, thanks to homeschooling! The school has been providing great PT and OT, but because they didn't consider her Autistic or SXI, they had dropped her from speech services. She can't carry on a linear conversation, or pick up social cues. The neuropsychology evaluation helped me understand her strengths and weaknesses a bit better, and she WILL be getting speech in the fall. Her brother has some similar speech and social issues. And an obsession with the calendar. Getting past the mourning period of a new diagnosis takes time, but getting the help your child needs because of a label is worth it. I believe that God always gives us more than we can handle so we have to rely on Him. We have a nephew on the spectrum, diagnosed at about the same age as your son. I am amazed how much progress he has made with therapy! Praying for you! Laura, who has to figure out her signature...

Edited by 4quintmom

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Countrymom9

Hugs and prayers here too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites